Dear Arthur
by fanficloverme96
Summary: TWO-SHOT: Merlin writes a letter to his king, expressing the words he can't say. Unknown to him, Arthur did the same to him.Merthur.
1. Chapter 1

__**Dear Arthur**

**Disclaimer: Merlin doesn't belong to me. Though sometimes, I wish it was. (Then, I could do something about the ending.)**

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><p><em><strong>Dear Arthur,<strong>_

_I'm sorry I disobeyed you._

I'm not much of a servant, am I? I'm clusy, occasionally rude, and worst of all, I sometimes disobey you. But believe me when I say this, Arthur, I disobey you for _YOUR_ sake. Not mine. Never mine. It was all for the sake of your safety. I promise.

_I'm sorry I broke my promise._

You constantly made me promise that I would not help you if you're in trouble. Despite my words, you know I can't promise you that. If I didn't help you, you could be left dying somewhere. And who would rule over Camelot if you're dead? More importantly, who would boss me around and treat me like crap if you're no longer here?

_I'm sorry I'm selfish. _

I worried you more times than I could count. Yes, I know you're worried. But like a stubborn prat you are, you won't admit it. It's okay, I kind of preferred it that way.

_I'm sorry I yelled at you._

I mean, who am I to do so? You're the king, I'm just a lowly servant. But Arthur, sometimes, I get too frustrated. I helped you so many times but I hardly ever got a single thank you out of it. But I'm sorry, regardless. I shouldn't raise my voice like that.

_I"m sorry that I'm-_

"Merlin?"

Merlin hastily finished his letter before scrunching the paper behind his back. He turned to see Arthur staring skeptically at him by the doorway. The king folded his arms as he raised his eyebrow.

"What are you doing?" Arthur asked.

Merlin quickly shrugged, taking a step back. "Nothing,"

"Are you sure?"

"Positive," Merlin nodded.

Arthur sighed. "Whatever you say, Merlin," he shook his head in annoyance. "Get ready two horses, will you?"

"Oh?" Merlin said. "Are we going somewhere?"

"_Gwen_and I will be going for a picnic. _You_ will be staying here polishing my armour," Arthur replied, stressing on his wife's name and his reference towards Merlin.

Merlin's smile wavered silghtly. "Right," he nodded. "I should've known," he whispered under his breath.

"What was that?" Arthur asked, his voice hinting threat.

Merlin shook his head and smiled brightly, doing his best to look innocent. "Nothing,"

Arthur raised his eyebrow. He hesitated before padding out of the room. "I'll see you to it, then, Merlin," he called out, his voice drifting into the room.

"Yes, sire," Merlin replied softly.

Slowly, his grip on the paper loosened and it fell onto the floor silently. On it, the last paragraph that Merlin wrote could be seen, written in a scrawly handwriting.

_**I'm sorry I'm in love with you.**_

_I know you're already married. But I'm sorry._

_I couldn't help myself._

Fin

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><p><strong>AN: Please review before anything else! It would be appreciated! **


	2. Dear Merlin

**Dear Merlin...**

**Disclaimer: One again, I DO NOT own Merlin.**

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><p>Arthur's sorry for many things. He's sorry for the deaths caused by his father's attitude towards magic. He's sorry for tears and cries from the families that lost someone they dearly loved. He's sorry for the war that happened. He's sorry for the suffering that his half-sister, Morgana, must have felt.<p>

But most of all, he's sorry for the unsaid words he wanted to convey to his most loyal servant and friend, Merlin.

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><p><em><strong>Dear Merlin<strong>_,

I'm sorry I yell at you. I'm sorry I work you to the bone sometimes. I'm sorry I use you as an outlet for my frustration. I'm sorry I never thank you, when I know you sacrifice more for me than even I know.  
><em><br>__I'm sorry I treat__you like a slave sometimes_.

We both know I don't think of you as one, don't we? Do you? Do you know how much I want you? How much it aches when I look at you sometimes, how much it overwhelms me to the point where I can either break down and beg, or shut off all emotion, protect my fragile heart with an insult about your intelligence? How much I need you, Merlin? How much I can't bear to lose you?

_I'm sorry I married her_.

I put my duty over my feelings again. I made the choice which was for the best for Camelot, but which physically hurts me every time I see her face in the morning, realize, yet again, that it's not you I'm waking up next to.

_I'm sorry I love you_.

And I'm sorry I will never be able to stop.

Yours,  
><em>Arthur.<em>

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><p>The crumpled piece of torn parchment rests in the farthest corner of the king's drawer. It will remain unseen, unknown, until the end of time.<p>

**Fin**

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><p><strong>AN: He he, this was suggested by a friend of mine, so I'll give her the credit for coming up with this. This fic was originally meant to be a one-shot but...I can't leave it hanging! Please review!**


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